[JBL]

I just did my first day of audit. I had to do cash disbursements. What is your favorite section to audit and how long does it normally take to be proficient in all phases of an audit?

[Skynet]

I can't really do an Audit until the woman I picked up at the bar comes home with me. Only then can I determine whether her assets are fairly represented.

AUD - 90
BEC - 78
FAR - 84
REG - 87

World Domination Plan

Phase I : Pass CPA Exams - Complete
Phase II : Megan Fox - In Progress
Phase III : Megan Fox & Scarlett Johansson Lingerie Pillow Fight
Phase IV : Form the new Charlie's Angels with Megan Fox, Scarlett Johansson, & Gal Gadot
Phase V : TBD

BEC : 78
REG : 87
FAR : 84
AUD : 90

World Domination Plan

Phase I : Pass CPA Exams - Complete
Phase II : Megan Fox - Initiated
Phase III : Bring back 8-Tracks
Phase IV : Megan Fox & Scarlett Johansson Lingerie Pillow Fight
Phase V : TBA

[the LAST Coffee]

Confirmations.

Listen, I need to confirm with your previous boyfriends to be sure that you are in fact, a nice lady with good assets.

FAR 84 (AUG '15)
BEC 83 (AUG '15)
AUD 79 (OCT '15)
REG 71, 78! (NOV '15, FEB '16)

[RE2PECT]

Sampling

I need to sample your attributes so I don't incorrectly reject you.

"Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity."

Roger & Ninja

FAR: 75
AUD: 73, 81
BEC: 71, 73, 82
REG: 68, 82

FAR: 75 Roger & Ninja (notes/flashcards/audio/MCQ)
AUD: 73, 81
BEC: 71, retake 8/29
REG:

[jm962011]

In rebuttal to all the men… I'm gonna get straight the point.

CASH

I want to make sure your bank roll is big enough for me to go on shopping sprees and vacations with. :-*

[jessica8926]

OMG jm962011 thank you totally made my day! hahahaha

AUD - 77
BEC - 82
FAR - 75
REG - 81

Illinois Certified Public Accountant 2016

AUD - 69, 77
REG - 74, 81
FAR - 75!
BEC - 71, 82

IL candidate!

Finally done (5/24/16)!! Yahooooooo!

[jm962011]

it's funny – I'm a Jessica too and one of your posts in another thread about if you hate accounting or not is basically my story as well… it just kind of made sense growing up in a family that struggled and my salary at 27 is more than my mom makes at 52.

edit: and now I look like creeper extraordinaire because I clicked your name it took me to your linkedin profile which I think I've seen before. Yes, ladies can be creepy 🙁

[jessica8926]

@jm962011: people have no idea how creeperish i can be so its ok. glad to hear someone out there is in the same boat as me in more than one facet of life!

AUD - 77
BEC - 82
FAR - 75
REG - 81

Illinois Certified Public Accountant 2016

AUD - 69, 77
REG - 74, 81
FAR - 75!
BEC - 71, 82

IL candidate!

Finally done (5/24/16)!! Yahooooooo!

[Anonymous]

-wine em dine em' SAS 99 'em
-performing agreed upon procedures with upper management
-inserting random words into workpapers to mess with partners like “bulbous receivable” or whatever comes to mind
-one of our not-for-profit clients owns a bunch of low income properties and had to put a firewall up at one of the properties because all of the bums were looking at porn and was fun documenting that in depth

[Author]

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