[Broag]

I’ve been working for my dad for almost six years now. I didn’t grow up wanting to be a CPA and didn’t actually start my CPA journey until about three years ago. I still want to be a CPA more than anything and I want to prove to myself that I can truly accomplish something great with my life. I’m not in it for the money. I work hard (at least I try my best to) and try to the best of my abilities.

My problem is is that I work with my dad. He’s been a CPA for 45 years and has had his own firm (the one I currently work at) for around 35 years. Much longer than I’ve been alive. He is very accomplished in the field and has nearly all the answers when it comes to tax law. He is never condescending, but doesn’t give me credit for the good work that I do. If I come up with a clever idea that seems reasonable, he never considers it and always nitpicks and destroys my ideas because I’m a grasshopper. On top of this, he isn’t a very good teacher and is rather impatient. This alone kind of drives me crazy, but the long busy seasons usually end in frequent arguments or disagreements as well.

I’m worried my growth as a professional is somewhat hindered by working for my dad and I have often wondered if it would better serve me going to another firm or possibly even getting out of public and going into industry (industry interests me a bit more for various reasons).

Also, I’m not a CPA yet. I’ve been trying for almost three years and I’m getting close to passing, but just not there yet. I’m 31 and my undergraduate degree was unrelated to accounting, so I essentially had to go back to school (Masters and some undergraduate classes) and teach myself everything that I know and use today.

My tentative plan at the moment is to get through this upcoming busy season and then start job searching/resume work (assuming I’m a CPA). Basically, I feel handicapped and I don’t enjoy being the “bosses son” very much.

Has anyone experienced anything like this in the past or currently? Even if you haven’t do you have any advice? How do you deal with something like this? I’m not trying to come off as arrogant or pretentious, because I suppose this isn’t a real problem. I’m lucky to have a well-paying job and I realize that. However, I do feel that my career may be better suited somewhere else.

I apologize for the long rant. Thanks for listening/reading.

REG - 79
FAR - ?
AUD - ?
BEC - ?

[Recked]

If your old man has been a CPA for 45 years, he has to be at least 65, but probably pushing or over 70.
I would assume that YOU are his succession plan at this point.
I would think long and hard before jumping ship as there is probably a very real chance that this firm will be yours one day.
You may want to have a talk with him about where he sees himself and his business in 5 – 10 years.

Most sole props in this business don't retire, they expire.
See what his plans are and make your moves accordingly, but I don't see you leaving this firm for another firm going smoothly at all.
How many people work at the firm? any partners? Buy-Sell agreements?

I'm 15 years in at my sole prop firm, and my boss is like a father to me.
We have a great working relationship but the money distribution doesn't seem too fair to me.
Once I pass the exam I'm going to see where this goes and plan my next steps. The current path is for me to make partner, but I don't currently have any specifics on what that arrangement would entail.

Memento Mori - Kingston NY CPA & EA (SUNY Albany 2002)

FAR-93 11/9/17 (10wks, 250 hrs, Roger 1800+ MCQs, Gleim TB 600+MCQs, SIMs)
AUD-88 12/7/17 (3 wks, 85 hrs, Roger 1000 MCQs no SIMs hail mary)
REG-96 1/18/18 (6 wks, 110 hrs, 1400 MCQs, no SIMs)
BEC-91 2/16/18 (4wks, 90 hrs, 1240 MCQs)

[Broag]

Hi ReckedRacing-

We are a growing mid-sized soon to be large firm in a mid-sized city. We are currently going through a merger, but will have close to 50 employees after the merger. We will be in the top 20 firms in our area/city which is exciting.

We have six partners, with my dad being the managing partner. He plans to work at least another 10 years (he is 68, btw). There is a buy-sell agreement between my dad and the other partners. And you're right, I am his succession plan and that makes my blood pressure rise due to pressure. Not just because I haven't passed yet, but also because I know he is relying on me taking over one day. I see the issues and volume of clients he deals with and it is quite daunting.

My biggest goal is to pass this damn exam and maybe my perspective will change. It's hard to not look down the road and plan accordingly, though.

REG - 79
FAR - ?
AUD - ?
BEC - ?

[Recked]

Get through the exam and then re-evaluate. People will take you more seriously and value your opinion more once they view you as a peer when you have passed the exam.
It seems like you are lined up to be an integral player.
You will grow into the role as time moves forward and you gain more experience.
Opportunities are often disguised as hard work so most people do not recognize them. Quote often attributed to Ann Landers or Thomas Edison if it includes overalls.

If your dad has a buy sell agreement with the other partners then he isn't really relying on you to take over, but he probably hopes it will happen as he sees it as the best for you.
He will be fine no matter what you decide to do, but it still would not come easy if you left for another firm.
Give it time and get through the exam. No other employer will cut you the same slack in giving you time to study and days off for the exam etc.
One step at a time.

If you do decide to leave that firm, it would probably go better between you and your father if you left public accounting, as that would be the only possible outcome that would not burn bridges.

Memento Mori - Kingston NY CPA & EA (SUNY Albany 2002)

FAR-93 11/9/17 (10wks, 250 hrs, Roger 1800+ MCQs, Gleim TB 600+MCQs, SIMs)
AUD-88 12/7/17 (3 wks, 85 hrs, Roger 1000 MCQs no SIMs hail mary)
REG-96 1/18/18 (6 wks, 110 hrs, 1400 MCQs, no SIMs)
BEC-91 2/16/18 (4wks, 90 hrs, 1240 MCQs)

[Ne’O]

Broag,

My godfather co-owns the large regional accounting firm now about 100 strong across 2 cities, about to hit their 50th year.
I watched my godbrothers grow up their father's career and expansion.
From their experience, I'm agreeing with “Memento Mori”.

-Yes it's Ne'O.

AUD:  72, 89

FAR:  71, 80

BEC:  83

REG: 82

Newbie CPA Candidate

[Broag]

ReckedRacing-

Thanks for all of your input. Very insightful. You hit the nail on the head. I don't feel like people take me seriously and it pisses me off beyond belief. I feel like my old man doesn't take me seriously at times. Frustrating.

This idea hasn't sprung itself overnight. This has been in the back of my mind for the past year or year and a half. I feel slightly immature for even bringing this topic up, but I've been very unhappy in my current situation at times. I'm just going to have to mull it over a while longer and re-evaluate after getting my CPA.

Ne'O-

Did your Godbrothers express any frustration or angst toward their dad over the years?

REG - 79
FAR - ?
AUD - ?
BEC - ?

[Ne’O]

Broag- “Did your Godbrothers express any frustration or angst toward their dad over the years?”

Yes, significantly. And I had my own frustrations with him, as he was one of my clients. We lost him as a client because he was quietly giving it to his sons. Not that they knew, and not that I could tell them without breaking confidence with my ex-client godfather.

I'm old enough now that I can say godfather is a bit of a Napoleon Dipstick- so I understand his sons. But his boys owe him and their wives a lot more than they were able to accept for a number of years. It was hard, them feeling Under the Wheel. Yet in many ways I was envious- their father cared and at least had a clue.

Don't think people see you as “The Bosses Son” with a silver spoon in your piehole. Most 21st century people know from tv, film, news, etc, what it is to work under a dominant father figure. You probably get a lot more quiet empathy than you know. How you comport yourself will matter.

-Yes it's Ne'O.

AUD:  72, 89

FAR:  71, 80

BEC:  83

REG: 82

Newbie CPA Candidate

[Right Brained Accountant]

@Broag – Your situation is totally understandable and it's admirable that you present your situation so honestly here. I think that's a hard issue to address with yourself let alone express it openly to others, so cheers to that.

I do think it's easier to let the situation/big picture seem like it's somersaulting into itself during these lull times (i.e. pre-crunch time, score releases, etc.) We put expectations on ourselves that are more readily observable now and it can be a little overwhelming. Remember that this license is within your reach and your perspective will be so much clearer once you proven to yourself that you have the leverage to make things happen. Keep going for it and don't look up until you're there.

Also, for what it's worth, I work at a small private firm where there are multiple family members and dynamics at play. As long as your personal relationship with your Dad stays intact, that's more valuable than any experience or paycheck you'll ever get. The opportunities will always be available to you and present themselves when you're open to them.

REG - 79

BEC - 78

FAR - 90

AUD - 87

"The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph." Fortune cookie circa 2012

8 exams in 16 months - Licensed CPA 2018

[Broag]

The last thing I want is to burn bridges with my dad. He has helped me immensely over the years and he truly does care (even if he doesn't show it). I wanted to seek advice from others so I wouldn't make any brash decisions regarding my career or my personal relationship with my dad. It's very difficult to not have emotions get involved because he is family.

Ne'O –
Your way with words is something to marvel (i.e. Napoleon Dipstick). That made me laugh. I try to conduct myself in the most respectful manner as possible when it comes to the other employees of the firm. I feel like I command some respect, but technically not so much. At least not yet.

Right Brained –
Thank you. Sometimes you feel like you're the only person on the boat. I'm the only family member that works at the firm so maybe that's a good thing. I know from some lawyer/accountant friends that they say their firms have a very strict policy of having family work for family because it can cause distractions and often hurt the organization's goals and mission.

All the feedback is greatly appreciated.

REG - 79
FAR - ?
AUD - ?
BEC - ?

[Right Brained Accountant]

I agree – @Ne'O is quite the wordsmith; always a pleasure reading those insights!

One last quick thing @Broag – whenever you feel your Dad is being too critical or tough on you, remember that he only does that because he knows you're intelligent, capable, and wants you to always reach your fullest potential. Delivery can be funny, but the best intentions are there. Sometimes aligning our perception with the reality of others is all we need to move it forward 🙂

REG - 79

BEC - 78

FAR - 90

AUD - 87

"The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph." Fortune cookie circa 2012

8 exams in 16 months - Licensed CPA 2018

[Ne’O]

Broag wrote, “Your way with words is something to marvel (i.e. Napoleon Dipstick). That made me laugh.”

Verklempt!
[Look it up. Use it on your father and others.
Watch them pretend they know what it means, kinda like my dog listening to me.]

-Yes it's Ne'O.

AUD:  72, 89

FAR:  71, 80

BEC:  83

REG: 82

Newbie CPA Candidate

[Author]

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