[mystical guy]

I’m a man in a Audit team with all my colleagues being women and the one who trains me has been a bit too “friendly” toward me, including getting into details of how I should organize my desk…bringing me stuff, cute gifts, asking me to join clubs she attends..etc.

She’s mentioned a couple of times that she’s engaged and often complains about her man, even asking me to agree with her…but I stay out of that.

I noticed that when she sits next to me, she will push her legs so close toward me that they will be very “intimate”. When I pull away my leg and give her space she becomes upset. She has also been touching me a lot and asking me out to lunch every day, even when I insist I go home for lunch. Constantly checks on my feelings, constantly asks if I’m happy and what she could “do” for me.

I’m just wondering, I’m I overreacting here or could she be attracted to me? I love this job so much and I know any type of affair or office romance will probably put me in jeopardy. I just wanna know that I’m overreacting and I’m crazy.

CPA - Since 2015
CISA - Smashed 2012
CIA - Passed 2015

[Anonymous]

oh my

[thechapman]

great time to ask for a raise

Passed - 2014

[CPAfit]

@mystical why you gotta be so rude? Just stop pulling your leg away 😛

AUD - 82
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HIYA!

NH Licensed CPA - Jun 2018

[mystical guy]

@thechapman Lol. I consider myself lucky to even have a job after almost 2 years of unemployment. But this thing scares me because it seems I can't win no matter what I do.

@zubairs… lol. If I'm not filing a sexual harassment complaint, maybe that's the way to go because if I pull my leg out or move away she doesn't train me very well on our new processes. She'll give me an assignment and tell me to “figure it out”.

CPA - Since 2015
CISA - Smashed 2012
CIA - Passed 2015

[mystical guy]

@thechapman Lol. I consider myself lucky to even have a job after almost 2 years of unemployment. But this thing scares me because it seems I can't win no matter what I do.

@zubairs… lol. If I'm not filing a sexual harassment complaint, maybe that's the way to go because if I pull my leg out or move away she doesn't train me very well on our new processes. She'll give me an assignment and tell me to “figure it out”.

CPA - Since 2015
CISA - Smashed 2012
CIA - Passed 2015

[Herbieherb]

Is she hot?

NEW YORK- DONE

[mystical guy]

@Herbieherb Very hot. Works out like clock-work. I'd give her an 8.5/10 rating. But I try very hard to think of her as a sister.

CPA - Since 2015
CISA - Smashed 2012
CIA - Passed 2015

[numbercruncher123]

@mystical guy, hmm maybe it's you who's leading her on, have you thought about that, lol! If your new, I would keep it professional friendly if you know what I mean. Also, could be your just overreacting. There are people who likes to be touchy touchy and very close especially when talking and you can actually smell what they had for lunch. lol

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BEC - IP (May 2014)
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[ryuhadoken]

@mystical guy She does sound too damn friendly to me. I see this situation as a no win for you. I hope you can find a way out of this by not being on her bad side. Although, I envy you my friend. You lucky bastard haha

[Mamabear]

It is interesting to see this situation reversed to a man and all the fun comments. Definitely not the same reaction if mystical were a woman and the boss was a man. Interesting…

Seriously though. If you are uncomfortable I would suggest you document anything you feel as inappropriate and maybe buddy up to some of the other girls on your team. If you give in to this your team members will probably notice and they'll have problems with you, not her.

CPA Exam - Finally DONE (November 2014)
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[mystical guy]

@numbercrunchermaniac Well, I'm an introvert and I keep to myself but she's constantly approaching me, and if I don't talk much she will send me IMs on our corporate IM function, just talking about personal stuff like what I'm doing for lunch, if I ever wanna have a beer with her after work…etc…. I always say, “no thanks, I'm busy, I can't make it….” etc. Hoping she'll realize I'm not interested in socializing outside work, but she keeps pounding me even harder when I resist.

@Mamabear The situation has bothered me for weeks because I really do like the job and I don't want to be involved with a colleague. It's so funny that she was asking me if I read the Employee Handbook. I opened it up and studied, “Sexual Harassment” and realized some of the things she does could be harassment like the constant leg touching and asking me out when I clearly said I'm not interested. The other ladies have noticed what's going on and keep reminding her that she has a fiance and is getting married, as a joke…. or not.. Who knows? I will start documenting!!

CPA - Since 2015
CISA - Smashed 2012
CIA - Passed 2015

[fuzyfro89]

Haha. Hard not to get close to people in public accounting… Though what you described is awfully close to flirting. Well, not close, it is flirting. The question is whether she's trying to initiate something, or if she's just a big flirt to get guys on her side.

Do your best to ignore it. Try not to overtly “reject” her. Just act clueless. Completely clueless. Hopefully she stops or it never goes beyond the flirty stuff. Believe it or not, some pretty women (no, ladies, not all of you) try to use their looks to get ahead.

Tread carefully. You are absolutely, office romances can make things very complicated and not in a good way. At least, not good for your career.

But damn, bro. 8.5/10?? Nice pull.

[Mamabear]

It may also help to picture her man as a 250 pound linebacker. Makes it seem a little less appealing to mess with his woman.

CPA Exam - Finally DONE (November 2014)
BEC (08/10/13) 80
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FAR (04/12/14) 81
REG (07/19/14) 69 (11/29/14) 87!!

[Mary 2496]

I would suggest that you find a way to curtail her behavior so that it does not put your own job at risk. Even though she is the one instigating this, you need to end it. You mentioned that you've just secured employment after two years? Don't lose it. You're not overreacting – she's definitely crossed the line with trying to tell you that she finds you attractive and wants it to go further.

If I witnessed this at my company, the woman would be reprimanded immediately. Most companies (and hopefully all) won't tolerate this type of behavior because even if you were (or are) willing to engage in any romantic behavior with her, it does nothing but create workplace drama and a potential lawsuit, should either of you then claim sexual harassment.

Watch it – you never really know what someone's motives are. I worked for a big retail chain clothing store in management for a short time during college (like a Macy's type store). This same thing happened except reversed. The male employee started hitting on a female employee. She agreed and they got together. They had a big falling out and then the female employee (who agreed to the relationship) then claimed sexual harassment even though she wasn't the original aggressor in the situation, and it was a huge mess. They both ended up losing their jobs. Senior management fired them for “other reasons” that they rationalized to be legitimate.

Just a word of caution for you!

[Skynet]

@mystical guy – May I ask what area are you located in? Which firm? and are there any job openings available?

Could you let the ladies know that I'm single, mid 30's, likes long walks on the beach and i will happily watch the “Notebook” with them.

AUD - 90
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World Domination Plan

Phase I : Pass CPA Exams - Complete
Phase II : Megan Fox - In Progress
Phase III : Megan Fox & Scarlett Johansson Lingerie Pillow Fight
Phase IV : Form the new Charlie's Angels with Megan Fox, Scarlett Johansson, & Gal Gadot
Phase V : TBD

BEC : 78
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AUD : 90

World Domination Plan

Phase I : Pass CPA Exams - Complete
Phase II : Megan Fox - Initiated
Phase III : Bring back 8-Tracks
Phase IV : Megan Fox & Scarlett Johansson Lingerie Pillow Fight
Phase V : TBA

[Author]

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