[readyfor2018]

Hi,

TLDR:
Took two exam parts this year, lost both of my dogs shortly after, went into deep depression, which resulted in job loss in November. Seeking advice for getting motivation back to study.

I’ve been a poster here before, but I created this separate account to seek some help with personal issues while taking the exam. I’m not really sure what I am looking for here, but I’ll start with giving some background from this year:

I passed two sections in the first half of 2017 (Reg, Bec). Five days before my second exam, my elderly dog did not survive a needed surgery. Taking the exam that day was extremely tough, and I spent the rest of the day cuddling with my other dog, who was a bit younger (I just had the two). She seemed really depressed, & started acting weird in the next few weeks. After taking her to the vet & getting her seen by a specialist, they agreed she likely had a brain tumor. I opted to not go through MRI or surgery with her, and I spent one last day with her before she was put down. It was the hardest decision of my life, I had gotten her as a puppy in college & she went through everything with me in my 20s, she was even the only family I had around me for years.

I went into a deep depression over the summer (I was diagnosed with major depression & anxiety a few years prior, it was semi controlled earlier this year). I decided to move my scheduled August test & take a few months to grieve, but it has hit me really hard & I still can’t get my focus or motivation back. I started therapy in the summer & was also diagnosed with adjustment disorder at that time.

My work was suffering a lot, and the CPA firm I worked for ended up letting me go in mid November (I don’t blame them, they were very kind & patient with me for months).

I guess I’m just looking for any advice people might have about juggling grief/job search/cpa exam.

Thank you for any advice you guys have, & I wish everyone a happy new year! At least 2018 has to be better, right? 🙂

[Recked]

Start running.
Seriously, its cheaper than therapy and will do more for you in the long term.
I won't get into the details of my past, but trust me.
Start small and work your way up. Make goals for not only running, but also the exam, and life in general. Focus on accomplishing those goals one by one.
Short term first, then long term.

One day at a time.

Remember your time here is limited. Every day lost to depression is another day you will never get back.
Focus on the future. Losing pets (and other family members) are some of the hardest things you will go through.
The sun keeps on shining, the world keeps on spinning. One day at a time…

Memento Mori - Kingston NY CPA & EA (SUNY Albany 2002)

FAR-93 11/9/17 (10wks, 250 hrs, Roger 1800+ MCQs, Gleim TB 600+MCQs, SIMs)
AUD-88 12/7/17 (3 wks, 85 hrs, Roger 1000 MCQs no SIMs hail mary)
REG-96 1/18/18 (6 wks, 110 hrs, 1400 MCQs, no SIMs)
BEC-91 2/16/18 (4wks, 90 hrs, 1240 MCQs)

[Anonymous]

Take whatever time you need to grieve and get through the turbulence. It is only a matter of time. The more distance you have from the tragedy, the better.
When you are at rock bottom, you can only go upwards! That's it! See my scores below – after my third 62, I decided to take time off. Now I'm almost ready to start again.
Again….it is all about time. I don't recommend prozac or zoloft or whatever else. They just mute problems, they don't solve them (I took those drugs for 6 years,
and in the end, they didn't do me any good because I wasn't suicidally depressed or anything.) Therapists can do very little for you. Most are incompetent, or at the very least,
unhelpful. They can't live our lives for us. BTW – my condolences. Dogs are indeed family members. I've always been a dog lover. I don't have one currently but someday again,
I will. After my last dog of 14 years died, I never replaced her. I'd see other dogs and just didn't connect with them the way I did with her. 🙁

[readyfor2018]

Wow, thank you for the responses so far. Wasn't sure I’d get anything out of posting here, but the responses so far have been very helpful emotionally. I always say I dont like running, but it’s been a few years since I tried, and your posts just convinced me to give it another try. I did start Zoloft a few months ago, which I thought was helping, but I’m obviously not doing well. Thank you for mentioning that losing a pet is like losing a family member, that’s really what it feels like, but a lot of people don’t see it that way. For now, I’m going to take your advice and start small, and start running a little. I appreciate your responses more than you know, youve given me a new perspective & I dont feel as lost as to what my next step is.

[readyfor2018]

@crazyleon I feel like I know what you mean, I can’t even describe the relationship I had with my dog Stacy, I had her since she was a puppy. I was 21 when I got her & we were inseparable since, even hid her in my backpack when I went to the library to study. I’ve refused to get another dog so far because I know I’ll never love another dog the way I loved her 🙁

[readyfor2018]

@crazyleon sounds like you had a rough year too, here’s to a great 2018! 🥂

[Recked]

If you don't like running you can bike, row or even walk.
Whatever it takes to get your heart rate elevated and release some endorphins.

Zoloft will steal your motivation and soul.
Use it if absolutely needed but after 2 weeks of walking, running or a combination of both I would try to half the dosage, and then a month later half it again.
A month after that half it again, and slowly ween yourself off.
Also avoid alcohol as it is a depressant.

If you just jump into running you will hate it because you arent trained for it.
Try walking for 5 minutes, then walk fast or light jog for 5, then back to walking. Start slow and progress.
Once you get your mind right you will be able to focus on other areas of your life like work or the CPA exam.

Lost my dog in 2016 after a couple of years of pills every 12 hours and injections every 4 weeks (Addison's Disease)
Also lost one cat in 2016 and one in 2017 both due to Congestive Heart Failure.
Give it time and just remember one day at a time.
Every new day is a chance to accomplish something small, even if its just getting out of bed and taking a shower.

Memento Mori - Kingston NY CPA & EA (SUNY Albany 2002)

FAR-93 11/9/17 (10wks, 250 hrs, Roger 1800+ MCQs, Gleim TB 600+MCQs, SIMs)
AUD-88 12/7/17 (3 wks, 85 hrs, Roger 1000 MCQs no SIMs hail mary)
REG-96 1/18/18 (6 wks, 110 hrs, 1400 MCQs, no SIMs)
BEC-91 2/16/18 (4wks, 90 hrs, 1240 MCQs)

[PonyUP]

Getting enough sleep and exercise are great suggestions. For sleep and anxiety, have you tried the weighted blankets. They are really great. Just search online. Also, watch what you each 4-5 hours before bed. No fast food, caffeine, or sugar.

It also sounds like you are an animal lover. While nothing will ever replace you fur baby, there are a lot of lonely older dogs that do not understand why their families left them in cold cells behind bars. January and February are the worst time for shelters. Older dogs (4 yrs up) are always the last to get adopted. But they so desperately need help. You are not replacing your dog. You are honoring your dog by saving the life of another fur baby that needs help.

If there is an equestrian lesson barn near your home, look at taking riding lessons. Riding is very therapeutic. It is also surprisingly more exercise than going to the gym. Since you are an animal lover being outside, exercising, and around animals might help a lot. Lessons without owning a horse run about $200 a month.

For your job search, I would download job postings that are one level above what you are looking for. Then get a professional resume writer to go to town on your resume. I use career perfect about every 5 years. I have never been disappointed. It costs about $300, and has always been worth it. They reformat and reword it based on the jobs I downloaded.

Get a white board or large paper, post it someplace visible. (back of a door, refrigerator, etc..) Write down your goals for 3 mth., 6 mth., 1 year, 3 year, 5 year, 10 year. Then put down 3-4 steps you need to take to reach that goal. Use the snowball method of checking off the little accomplishments. As you visualize the checks next to the little things, the bigger things start to look more real. Be diligent about writing down milestones and accomplishments. Then reward yourself when you reach small goals (a movie, great meal, etc..)

AUD - NINJA in Training
BEC - NINJA in Training
FAR - NINJA in Training
REG - NINJA in Training

Good Luck future CPA's,

From

PonyUp

[Author]

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